2005-10-11; the only male

My grandpa died in the hospital at 4pm on Wednesday. When I went to find my grandmother in the grieving room the hospital has set aside, you could see devastation racing through every part of her body, quick to wreck every part of her happiness. Her sadness so heavy (after spending 31 years with him) that her sobs did not come out until my father (her son) embraced her; the sadness hoping the tears landing on his shoulder could finally alleviate some of the weight of it rather than its tear drops simply seeping back into her cheeks.

It was peaceful though, his heart just slowed down. The nurse rushing in, stroking his arm and his forehead “It’s ok, Albert. It’s going to be ok”. And just a few hours earlier he was telling my mom “I’m so sick. I am so sick”.

My sadness at it is causing almost every other emotion to lag behind.

My band was part of a recording session for a show being marketed to The Disney Food Channel. We played on the theme song (a 1937 jazz song called, Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off). I have no idea if it will pan out, but the newspaper was there so I’ll at the very least have something for my press kit. It is for a cooking show called The Fear of Frying (hosted by the guy who played Babu on Seinfeld). Hopefully something comes of it.

I have been going to yoga over the past couple weeks. The stretching kind of reminding me that we can reach for things higher than we think we can attain. In a group of about twelve students, I am the only male.

We’re here to bring happiness; we weren’t meant to suffer at all.
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